On Being “Chapter 2”

There has been a lot of discussion lately regarding one’s ability to love again after the loss of someone important in life; can you love another person in the same way you love who was lost? In my opinion you can’t love the same way, but you can love in a different way. Speaking from my own personal experience I lost one of my best friends in 2004 in a plane crash. He and I spent so much time just (read more…)

Dear widow police – I won’t revoke my card

Nearly six years ago I was given exclusive membership to one of the worlds crappiest clubs.   October 9th, 2009 – the day I went from being half of M & M, Mrs. Michelle Steinke, and the wife of Mitchel Steinke to becoming a widow. No thanks. You can keep your membership card because at 36, with a 1 and nearly 3 year old at home, and nothing but years of life planned before us – I don’t want admittance (read more…)

Because I love You

Bear with me on this post….I promise I have a point.  😉 Yesterday was a LONG day in my life.  I woke up at 4:15 am to do hot yoga, followed by an hour at the gym, countless conference calls, writing an article for publication, and preparing for an interview today. The kids got home and my day seemed even crazier with homework, dinner to make, and time to read some Magic Treehouse to my son.  My husband Keith is (read more…)

Marrying A Widow

Today, my fiancé Keith told me he wrote something that he wanted me to share here on One Fit Widow. What you read below was written by Keith with the intention of helping others understand the viewpoint of being in a relationship with a widow from a chapter 2’s perspective. Marrying a Widow – The Other Man In two days I will be marrying my beautiful fiancée, Michelle. She will become my wife, but I am not so sure I will (read more…)

After the Kiss

He kissed me softly and as he did, I tried to quiet my mind and stop the noise.  I tried to live in the moment and embrace this new page in my story without expectation and without concern for what it meant to my past and for my present.  I tried to enjoy that split second and linger in the comfort it provided. I failed miserably at my attempt. My mind raced with every emotion under the sun from guilt (read more…)

Parallel Universe and the Gifts of Grief

  For the most part I have become accustom to my new life post loss.  Life never goes back to what it was before but I have learned to live a new normal and take it all in stride.  My new normal includes many parts of my old normal, but the backdrop has shifted and the photos are minus one very important person.  My new normal also includes my chapter 2, and as we create new memories together my life (read more…)

Thanksgiving 2011 – Living Again Beyond Loss

The start of 2011 was a pivotal turning point in my life post loss. I was emotionally drained and tired of living life as a grieving widow. I remember writing that I was sick and tired of grieving which was probably not the politically correct thing to say but my reality just the same. I was ready for a change and I was ready to feel like I was living again. I started to look at life a little differently (read more…)