Stifled Grief: How The West Has It Wrong

Stifled Grief: How the West Has It WrongThe reality is you will grieve in some capacity for the rest of your life. Once loss touches you-you are forever changed despite what society tells you. Stop looking at the expectations of an emotionally numbed society as your threshold and measuring stick for success.By Michelle Steinke-Baumgard, ContributorOne Fit Widow After nearly seven …

BROWN EYED BOY

BROWN EYED BOY My kids go to school about a mile from where my husband’s plane went down. It’s an excellent school with a fantastic reputation, but for a few moments after Addy got a spot on the waiting list I had reservations about going there simply due to proximity. The airport is a busy one with 2 flight schools …

DEAR WIDOW POLICE – I WON’T REVOKE MY CARD

DEAR WIDOW POLICE – I WON’T REVOKE MY CARD  LOVING AGAIN, CHAPTER 2, GRIEF COMPARISON, DEALING THE DAMAGE OF LOSS Nearly six years ago I was given exclusive membership to one of the world’s crappiest clubs. October 9th, 2009 – the day I went from being half of M & M, Mrs. Michelle Steinke, and the wife of Mitchel Steinke to becoming a …

I CAN’T FIX THIS

I CAN’T FIX THIS My son was 13 months when he lost his father. He holds no memories of his daddy and never asks questions or brings him up. He is a happy, well-adjusted, smart, and lovable five years old. He just also happens to be a kid who’s dad died way too young. Truth be told, I don’t worry …

SAY THEIR NAME

He was one of the most important parts of my life for more than fifteen years. We traveled, we explored, we lived and loved. He made me his wife, and I made him my husband. We welcome two beautiful kids into the world, built a house and lived our dream. He held my hand when I cried, and he kissed …

THE HEARTACHE OF DONUTS WITH DAD AND MUFFINS WITH MOM

THE HEARTACHE OF DONUTS WITH DAD AND MUFFINS WITH MOM Dear school administrator, I think it’s time we drop Donuts with Dad and Muffins with Mom. Allow me to explain why so many of us feel this way. I’m writing this letter to you on behalf of every single SOLO parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle or godparent in this world. Some …

THE #1 BEST THING ABOUT BEING WIDOWED!

THE #1 BEST THING ABOUT BEING WIDOWED! I’ll save you all the work of scrolling down through this text to find the answer to the teaser that is in the title of this blog. The best thing about being Widowed is: OTHER PEOPLE’S JUDGEMENT Whaaaaaaat?! Yes. Other people judging you is the number one best part of widowhood (having permission …

BEFORE THE NEXT STAGE

BEFORE THE NEXT STAGE It seems like yesterday that the doctor placed you in my arms and I fell in love. You were, and still are incredible. So tiny So innocent So perfect within your newness I didn’t know that less than three years from that moment, I would have to look in your sweet and beautiful blue eyes and …

TELL ME ABOUT MY DADDY….

TELL ME ABOUT MY DADDY…. “Mommy, tell me about my Daddy please.” She looked at me with her big blue eyes, and she didn’t falter. It was the evening of her eleventh birthday, and the first time in eight years she had ever asked me to sit down and tell her about her Father. We talk about him often; he …

WIDOWHOOD: THE GLASS HOUSE OF GRIEF

WIDOWHOOD: THE GLASS HOUSE OF GRIEF Welcome to widowhood. I’m giving you fair warning this journey will be perhaps the crappiest you ever endure. This journey is difficult regardless of your kind of loss. It may have come as a shock; it may have been expected, regardless of your circumstances, it is beyond painful. No words do the pain any …